I recently read that a psychologist at Yale undertook the most successful course in its history: The Science of Well-being. Specifically, how we get caught in the satisfaction treadmill. A mechanism called hedonic adaptation.
We seek shallow satisfaction (winning the lottery, that job promotion, a new car/house), but soon after obtaining those things, our brain reverts to normal, and the feeling of satisfaction disappears. A constant sugar rush. We head towards something, achieve it, then the euphoria dies. “I know that,” I hear you say, but what is most interesting is that despite this, we all still do it.
Conversely, what does give us longer satisfaction is meeting friends, being philanthropic, and getting a good night’s rest. These, though, we give far less import to in our lives. So, what Laurie Santos’s course focused on was learning to rewire the students’ brains so as to change what Santos called ‘miswanting’.
To do this, she proposed a twelve-second focus on savouring a positive feeling so it can be encoded into long-term memory. Without this, they are simply experiences, not lasting memories. Being fully present in positive moments as they happen, rather than photographing them or sharing them with others, which takes us out of the moment.
Less time on our phones, more time with loved ones, exchange a purchase for an experience, and be present throughout them all.
If you’d like to try it. Before you sleep tonight, relive the best moments of your day. Savour them. Allow the joys to seep into your psyche. Retrain yourself to enjoy the best bits of life and the next day, seek them out purposefully. It is in these that true satisfaction lies.